Listening to my short 4c hair

Black girl smiling in a forest

I’ve noticed something about my hair.  It is THIRSSTY! 

It doesn’t matter if I stepped out of the shower two hours ago, my hair still wants water! I have a sensitive scalp and many tender spots. So when I let my hair get too dry (I know, a very bad thing to do), it hurts so much and it feels like someone pulled my hair.

I have always seen hair as just hair, but our hair is our crowing glory, it’s actually alive, and it has its own needs.

Instead of actually paying attention to my hair, I would just get frustrated and shave it instead. I shaved it so much that it became my look. No one had ever seen my hair past a certain length. When I was ready to take the bold step and commit to growing it out, I realized my hair was actively breaking in certain spots. My hair was so short and so thin in those tender spots I mentioned before.

On my own, I could not figure out what was going on with, but I’m so grateful for a friend of mine who is passionate about natural hair care. That’s the thing with natural hair, it bridges people and creates community. She helped me figure out what was happening with my hair and she recommended products I could try, but the main thing that my hair needed was hydration. I have low porosity hair, so that means it does not absorb water easily. I always thought if I washed my hair weekly, put shea butter in it, misted it here and there, then I would be fine. But I am learning even though I am a fairly low maintenance person, my hair isn’t. My hair does not need much, but it is delicate, and it needs attention, and this can come in the form of misting it as often as I can.

I had a dry season recently, where my hair was hidden under a wig, and I was not moisturizing it. With time, my scalp pain started and it became difficult to ignore, I had to take the wig off and go back to moisturizing it. I would step out of the shower but two to three hours later, I had to spritz my hair again. But as the days went by, I realized the number of times I had to reapply water gradually decreased. It makes me think of the times when you decide to start drinking more water and find yourself visiting the washroom too often. But with time, your body adjusts to the amount of new water being taken in. And I think that’s what happening to my hair: it’s establishing a new normal. We’re going from dehydrated and hurting to hydrated and thriving.

Don’t give up on your hair, you may not see results right away, but continue with your regimen and you will gradually see results.


Leave a comment below and join the conversation! What does your #NewNormal look like?



About the Blogger: Ataisi Iris

A profile picture of Ataisi posing with her hand under her chinThis article was written by one of our Blog Contributors, Ataisi Iris. Ataisi runs her own blog, called Face to Face with Abba. She uses writing as a medium to share her honest life  experiences, hoping others can relate and learn from her journey. She is also a portrait photographer and specializes in self-portraits. When she is not shooting, writing or studying, she is most likely watching funny videos on YouTube or taking walks. Ataisi loves people, and desires to see everyone be the best version of themselves. You can find more of her work at Her socials are @ataisiiris and @ataisiirisportraits on Instagram.
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